Memento
by Aspicia
Summary: Enveloped in grief, Lelouch sought solace in the only thing he had from her. "So that you'll always have something to remember me by..."


**Author's note:** _This takes place after post-canon Euphemia's death. I got inspiration while I was doing my hair this morning XD _

_Happy New Year! :D_

* * *

A heavy sigh left his lips. It was a sigh not of relief, not of exhaustion, but one of _devastation_. Then again, one would experience nothing less than such a god awful, heart-wrenching emotion after taking the life of the one you love. He wasn't the type to cry, really – he vowed not to ever since his mother's assassination – and even now, with how he was feeling, he still didn't shed a tear.

But tears were not needed to show that Lelouch was grieving. Grieving for Euphemia's death.

Sitting on his bed, he buried his head into his hands, suddenly feeling the need to recall anything about Euphemia, any happy memory he shared with her back when they were children. Perhaps his grief got in the way, for his thoughts were all dull and grey; not even the slightest tinge of _pink_ could be mentally visualised. Then, as though he recalled something, the raven-haired man got up and walked over to his desk.

He hesitated for a moment, but eventually reached for the knob of the left drawer. No one else had ever seen the contents of that particular drawer. Not even Sayako, who tidied up after him if there was ever a need. (This wasn't often of course, seeing as Lelouch had a good habit of keeping his room neat. But boys could be boys sometimes.) Steadying his breathing, Lelouch pulled the drawer open, shuffled some old letters and photographs, until he found what he was looking for.

A long red satin ribbon.

Lelouch walked back and sat on the edge of his bed, staring at the red ribbon as though burning its image into his mind forever. Not that he could ever forget it of course. It was a gift, a very special gift, from a very special someone.

_Such a long time ago..._

* * *

**(Eight years ago; Imperial Britannian Palace)**

_Little Lelouch stared helplessly at the pink-haired girl who was crying in front of him. Even at the tender age of nine, he was able to master chess, tackle quantum physics, recognise star constellations, and already read through eight volumes of Encyclopedia Britannica; yet he could do nothing to comfort his weeping half-sister. Intellect was no assistance to him that day._

_"Euphie, it'd only be a month, nothing longer I think," Lelouch reassured, "I'll be back before you know it."_

_Euphemia sniffled. "B-b-but, it's not fair! Why can't I follow you and Aunt Marianne and Nunnally to the countryside? Father's being unfair!" She couldn't help but whine a little, being brought up as a princess and all. Soon, she realised how immature she was acting in front of Lelouch, and felt her face grew hot. Embarrassed, she tried to dry her tears with a handkerchief, and failing miserably in the process._

_Lelouch shuffled his feet, and twiddled his fingers. "I know you'll miss me, Euphie, and I will too. I'll write to you every day, alright?" he offered. "Don't worry, I won't ever forget you."_

_His last statement began to put her at ease somewhat, and her tears stopped at least. "But what if you don't come back? Ever?" she hiccupped, twisting her handkerchief in anxiety._

_He smiled. "Don't be silly. Of course I'll come back! Where do you get these weird ideas?" Chuckling, he went forward to give her a hug. Lelouch felt her body relax against his. Satisfied, he pulled back to wipe her moist cheeks. Finally, Euphemia smiled back at him._

_And suddenly, she began hopping in excitement. "Oh! Oh, I know! I want to give Lelouch something to remember me by!"_

_He sweatdropped. "Eh? You don't have to..."_

_"But I want to!" she exclaimed, clapping her hands in glee. (It's amazing how quickly her mood swings.) Euphemia reached for the neat little bow that kept her hair in place whenever she ran here and there in the Imperial Gardens. Without any hesitation, she gave it a pull, and the ribbon untied itself, dancing in the air before falling neatly on her palm. Confidently, she held it out to the puzzled Lelouch._

_"Here! I want Lelouch to have this!"_

_"Huh?" He was taken aback. "But that's your favourite ribbon, Euphie! I couldn't possibly..." He was also wondering what on earth a boy like him was to do with a girl's ribbon._

_She shook her head. "No, it's okay, Lelouch! It's because it's my favourite ribbon that I want you, my favourite brother in the whole world, to have it!" Grinning, Euphemia took his hand and gently place the pretty red ribbon on his palm. Lelouch stared at it, speechless, and his cheeks tainted pink as well._

_"So that you'll always have something to remember me by," she said shyly. "And if you miss me, you can hold it and then you'll think of me."_

_"Euphie, I don't need this to remember yo_–_"_

_"Oh, just take it!" She stomped her foot, like a child demanding for her share of ice cream, and feigned a scowl. Lelouch gulped, for he knew better than to cross Euphemia; who knew if she would go off crying to Cornelia, and then he'd be sorry._

_Fingering the ribbon, he looked up at her with a smile etched on his handsome face. "I'll treasure it always, Euphie."_

_"I'm so glad!" the pink-haired girl squealed in delight and rushed forward to give a final embrace._

* * *

**(In the carriage to the countryside)**

_"That's an interesting piece you're wearing there, Lelouch," Marianne remarked, wearing an amused expression. She reached out to her son's collar._

_The young boy shifted in his seat, turning red in embarrassment, and subconsciously touched the neat little bow he had tied around his collar. Before the three of them had left the palace, Clovis had teased him earlier for choosing to forgo the usual "manly" cravat with a "girly" red ribbon instead, to which Lelouch try not to pay any attention to._

_"I think it makes Brother even prettier!" Nunnally giggled._

_"Boys aren't supposed to be pretty." Lelouch stuck out his tongue at her, and then felt silly for doing so._

_Marianne covered her mouth with her hand, laughing quietly. "Well, I think it's a nice change. It certainly suits you." And she gave him a teasing wink._

_Though he was still a little red from being teased, Lelouch smiled back at his mother and sister. He reached up for his bow again._

_"Thank you. It's...one of my most prized possessions."_

* * *

Blinking from that memory, Lelouch lay back on his bed, holding up the red ribbon in the air. He smoothened it out, feeling the soothing softness of the material, and then absentmindedly wrapped it loosely around his fingers. He brought it closer to his face, as though trying to catch even a tiny whiff of Euphemia's scent, even though he knew that any such trace of it was already gone, dispelled by time.

Clutching the ribbon to his chest, he closed his eyes to summon up a memory of her again.

"What are you doing?"

Opening his eyes, he turned to his side, to see C.C.'s eyes meet his own. She had entered the room, standing casually by the door.

Lelouch sighed again, and looked back to the satin material he was still holding.

"Nothing...just thinking of happier times."


End file.
